My Family

If you are here, then I should share with you a little bit about the history of my family. My family was a military family because my father was in the South Vietnamese Army. He was seldom home due to the nature of his career. I sometimes wonder how it was possible that my frequently absent father and my mom were able to find the time to create such a large family -- 10 children, yes, 10 !

Because my dad was seldom home, my oldest brother, Phu, assumed my dad's role as the father figure when we were young . He taught all of us so well that we were all accepted into a good school in Vietnam. I always looked up to him as a young girl. Now, since we are all grown up and have our own families, we seem to forget his big impact on our lives. We should show him more love and appreciation.

The person who is very close to me in age and in spirit is my sister, Mai. She and I played together when we were growing up. I always feel that my mom did a good job by having all of us as a group with not much difference in ages, which resulted in a strong bonding to each other, and we never felt lonely as children.

I have to say that even though Mai is older than I, she always follows and looks up to me. Mai is a soft-spoken and a somewhat shy person. Consequently, when we were young, I always bossed her around or tricked her into doing something that she normally would not do. I remember the first day that she had to go to school, but she refused to go because she thought that I had to go with her. My mom put her outside the door, but she wrapped her arms around the column in front of our house and cried uncontrollably. My mom was able to get her out of there, but she just stood under the sun and cried demanding that I had to go with her. Finally, my mom gave up; as a result, Mai and I went to school the next year together, and we both shared so many memorable moments during the K12 years.

On April 30, 1975, the communist North Vietnamese took over South Vietnam. We lost contact with my dad. We didn’t know that he was still alive. Because we were a military family of south Vietnam, my mom was so afraid for the safety for all of us and the uncertainty of the future of Saigon. My mother decided to take Mai and me with her to a farm and to have my oldest brother and sister stay behind in Saigon to care for my younger siblings and at a familiar location for my dad to contact our family if he were still alive.. Mai and I hated the farm. We didn’t know why we had to be there. At the end of 1977, my mom had to go back to Saigon to check on some of her children that she left behind after the fall of Saigon in 1975. Before she left the farm, she instructed me that it was very important that at the stroke of midnight on New Year's eve, Mai and I had to go outside to pray to God "Cung te troi" (for god harvest crops of the farm). I took this opportunity to ask Mai to pray against our mom’s wish. Mai didn’t want to do this. However, after I convinced her that if the farm was not doing well, then there would be no reason for us to stay on the farm. Of course, our farm did terribly that year, and we did come back to Saigon. I did claim a victory for myself, but the fact was during that same year, our dad, who safely escaped and was living in the United States, did find a way to contact us.

Last year, Mai came to visit me, and she told me that she published her first poetry book that she dreamt of doing as a young girl. The title of her book is "Ngay bao loan", which is now in Vietnamese bookstores in California, but you can also view her book here:

https://docs.google.com/viewer?a=v&pid=gmail&attid=0.2&thid=1306b59a6f719ae0&mt=application/msword&url=https://mail.google.com/mail/?ui%3D2%26ik%3D17e8752ffd%26view%3Datt%26th%3D1306b59a6f719ae0%26attid%3D0.2%26disp%3Dattd%26zw&sig=AHIEtbRJHNNckqJLBXMcuBZxsYpVYRFv0A.

I shared with her my dream about publishing a cookbook myself someday, and she told me to just do it one day at a time and to finish one page each day because that strategy guided her to finish her book.
Since growing up together, I believe that Mai always respected and listened to my advice. However, now I have to admit to Mai that for the first time in my life, I admire her courage and self-discipline and have taken her advice and started a blog where I can share my knowledge of cooking with others. Who knows? Maybe someday I can publish my own cookbook just like Mai has published a book of poetry.

For you Mai, it is indeed one day at a time.!!!